Becoming a parent is one of the best things that can happen to you. However, parenthood comes with a lot of obstacles that make it challenging for you to be the father or mother you desire to be.
Your beautiful 5-year old baby may turn into an overenergetic and uncontrollable nightmare overnight. Your 12-year old may become disrespectful and detached leaving you with the hopeless alarm of trying to figure out where it all started.
You may be trying to find out how it all started without any success. Do not despair because you are not alone. A lot of parents are dealing or are at least trying to deal with their disrespectful or disconnected kids and some have found effective ways of overcoming the challenges of parenthood.
Spending quality time with your child can influence positive change.
One common challenge you may face as a parent is failing to spend enough time with your child due to your busy schedule. This is quite normal in this day and age where people are preoccupied with finding new ways of improving their livelihoods professionally, academically, etc. However, until you realize the importance of spending time with your child, you may never be able to positively influence his or her behavior.
Your child becomes distant when you fail to give him/her your time.
One of the main reasons your child becomes disrespectful and distant out of the blue is that they are not getting the attention they deserve or need from you. That is why spending quality time with your children is important no matter how busy you are. If you want to start seeing positive change in your child’s behavior make sure you include him or her in your everyday schedule.
Spending quality time with your child is not limited to going camping or going on vacation at least twice a month. It does not have to be something big or extravagant. It can be something as small as playing in the backyard with them, helping out with their homework, or just sitting down and listening to them. Keep in mind that what your child needs from you is that you give them the attention they need. Show your son or daughter how much you care by just being there for them.
Practical ways of effecting positive change in your child’s life.
- Expect positive change from your child.
“You can never do anything right.” “You are no good.” Such negative comments have the power to turn your child’s life upside down. Negative comments leave your child feeling worthless and unloved and he or she retaliates by being stubborn or outright defiant. However, you can avoid all this by simply refraining from negative talk and passing positive and encouraging compliments.
Start by expecting good behavior and telling him or her that you are expecting only great things from them. Your conversations must be centered on positive affirmations that build character.
- Communicate well with your kids.
A lack of communication often leads to misunderstandings. That is why you have to start communicating effectively with your children. Let them know what you expect from them and make sure you emphasize that good behavior will be rewarded while bad behavior will entail consequences. Once you make that decision, make sure you see it through.
If your son behaves the right way make sure you reward him for it, stay true to your word. If your daughter misbehaves make sure she gets the discipline which entails. Remaining true to your word will not only make the kids take what you say seriously but it will help them pause and think each time they are about to do something. Good or bad.
- Work with your partner.
Sometimes raising your kids is becomes difficult when you try to do it alone. However, it becomes much easier when you are working with your partner. They say it takes a village to raise a child and it is not a lie. Work with your partner, parents, sibling, and other people in your life. Do not shut your spouse out when trying to change the way your child conducts himself or herself. Set the right example by working together and making decisions together.
One mistake you can make when reprimanding your kids is arguing in front of them or disagreeing on how you can best correct them for wrongs that have already been committed. So, avoid this by making decisions together and agreeing with each other whenever they are around. Any differences you have can be settled when the kids are not around.
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